"Receive My Silent Prayers"

(A struggling response to the 9 murders at Emanuel AME Church in Charleston, SC 6-17-15)

“Emmanuel”, God-With-Us … Yesterday, as we wept and prayed, as we began to grasp the depth of grief among your children in Charleston, you wept among us and with us. You received each of our prayers as if each one was a singular tearful conversation with you.

This morning, I will admit, I am having difficulty finding even a few words of prayer for the shooter. The words are elusive and garbled and where there are words, they are certainly not in complete sentences. To be honest, perhaps it is me who does not want to pray for him.

Do I think that my prayers for others will be watered down by a sentence or two whispered for this one who is so filled with hate? Just maybe the words are there, waiting in this silence.

Receive, O God, my silence and my gasps as a prayer this morning, yearning to free itself into your care. Place your words within my heart so that I might give them back to you.

AMEN.